With the fifth anniversary of Tiger Woods' infamous run-in with a fire hydrant little more than a week away, Tiger had to find something dumb to do to celebrate, and he has succeeded.
Instead of ignoring a devilishly funny and scathingly accurate fictionalized portrayal of a Q-and-A that never actually took place between Golf Digest columnist Dan Jenkins and his immature and arrogant self, Tiger decided to tell the whole world to read it.
He didn't just come out and say: Read this. No, he actually went to a section of Derek Jeter's new website, apparently reserved for whiny multimillionaire athletes, and blasted the Jenkins piece even though it is clearly labeled "fake" on the cover of the December issue of Golf Digest – a cover that features Johnny Manziel holding a Cleveland Browns' golf bag while striking the Heisman pose.
The four-page spread that Tiger just had to tell us all about appears three pages from the very back of the golf magazine's December issue, which is just about as buried as a sports article can ever be. It was certain to go unread by 99 percent of the population – including me. I get Golf Digest and I hadn't noticed the headline, nor had I cracked open that issue, until Tiger told me to.
In the mid-1990s, Earl Woods really did compare his son to Gandhi, which I always thought was quite unfair because Gandhi never could break 80.
But I digress. Tiger could have and should have laughed it all off. That he didn't speaks volumes about just how true some of those "fake" answers really are.
Happy 5th Anniversary, Tiger.